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PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 12:23 pm 
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I've just been hit hard by a truck, carrying old and faded memories.

This is the outcome.

Music will follow shortly.

----------------------------------

You may be gone

Sitting here waiting’
For someone to wake me up
Staring at the wall
Hoping to fall asleep again
Thinking or dreaming
What if, could we, how would

Sitting here weeping
Remembering all the things we shared
Trying to catch
The last scents you left
Only to find
That you took them with you

Laughter stopped, turned grey again
Memories stay but already fade away
What if, could we, how would
…had you stayed and not turned away

Sittin’ here tryin’
To remember how it was
Trying to find
The missing link
You took it with you
As well

Laughter stopped, turned grey again
Memories stay but already fade away
What if, could we, how would
…had you stayed and not turned away

Hanging on to
What we shared
Supressing tears
I’ve carried for years
You may be gone
But never forgotten


----------------------------------

Too dark? Too cryptic? Too shallow?

Thanks for your feedback.

Mic

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 12:31 pm 
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Robbie The Botkiller
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Too much Buchstaben - SING them! 8)

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 12:34 pm 
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I will!

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 12:52 pm 
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Robbie The Botkiller
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MicEater wrote:
I will!


I'm waiting for it!

Image

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 1:59 pm 
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Mr. Electonica Dude
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You got music already ? Isn't it cool to get inspired like that. I wished I had a USB /brain cnnection to record the melodies that play in my head during the twilight of sleep and wake.

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 2:09 pm 
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No, I haven't got any music by now... but I'll try to find the suiting sounds tonight :wink: .

If you ever find that USB-connection... let me know ;-).

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 3:10 pm 
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Too dark? no way
Too cryptic? not at all
Too shallow? definitely not

This should make for a great song once the music comes!

I especially like the "what if, could we, how would" line.


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 3:16 pm 
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kester wrote:
I especially like the "what if, could we, how would" line.


Funny you like this one... at first this was more of a filler... but after some time, it reminded me of "Shoulda, woulda, coulda"... and I decided to keep it :wink: .

Thanks, Kester!

Michel

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 28, 2005 7:12 am 
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Just to keep you posted.

I've spent a couple of hours yesterday night, trying to find some music to go with the lyrics I had posted earlier.

It worked - I guess - and I've even played the guitar to get it where it actually is :shock: .

I've tried to mix it down to an mp3 to post, but was facing some strange pop and crackle problems. I'll retry tonight and post this short (2 verse, 80 second) demo as soon as I can ;-) .

Have great days :wink: !

Michel

P.S. We're facing 34 degrees celsius (93F) today... we already ordered a couple of palms, deckchairs and 10 tons of sand to redecorate the office 8) !

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 Post subject: suggestions
PostPosted: Thu Aug 11, 2005 8:29 am 
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Oldie Of The Month
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Mic,

A good first draft. My suggestions would be to think of a metaphor or simile that could go in a line or two, but even more, I think it needs imagery. Describe the "scent" more. Did she leave any clothes hanging in the closet? What color was the dress left hanging? What about some shoes, etc? Maybe she left a necklace or something on the dresser. What was the weather like outside that day? What time of day is it when the song is being sung? What day of the week is it? Basically, add some detail to add color and imagery. Just my 2 cents.

-Rob

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 11, 2005 8:30 am 
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Hey rob, good points really, which I might take into consideration.

The song is going to be lying around for some more time... it needs some ageing before I look at it again.

Thanks for the inputs 8) !

Michel

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