The DijonStock Digital Home Recording Support Forum

hey, you texastock hosers! like, where are you?

yeah eh, like we've been driving around texas for the last five days trying to find the ranch, eh

because dumbass hosehead here left the map at home eh

did not, hosehead... you used the last piece of it up at that unattended rest stop back in arkansas

well when ya gotta go ya gotta go, eh

well you really hosed us this time - we got so lost last night

yeah eh, we ended up at that bar in waxahachie where the cowboys were wearing chaps with no asses in them

shut up eh, did not

did too

you promised we'd never talk about that

at least that big cowboy with the village people mustache kept buyin' us free beers all night

they didn't end up being quite free, hosehead... i still have arse-ritis

i thought we weren't gonna talk about that either remember

so do any of you hoseheads know where the turn of is for winscott-plover road?

that was three hundred miles ago you stoopid hoser

take off eh

you took off enough last night, hosehead

you said we'd never talk about that again

Oh man! Bob and Doug lost in Texas? Watch your livestock cowboys!! That's far worse than Tudan driving on the left side of the interstate.

The guys would be better off with the sheep. They're easier to manage and feel more natura..........

errrrr, that's what I've been told anyway.

_________________
"Saying you're an adult would make you an IM-poster." - Robbie jan 2006

I will use my robot hand for good.

Just keep driving in circles, boys. Texas ain't that big. You'll find 'em sooner or later. Good luck.

_________________

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Don't judge the coffee by its cup.
The proof of the cheese is in the eating

hey hoser, wake up

zzzzzzzz... what? like, where are we?

we're finally here

huh... we're where?

6709 sky road - we're finally at texastock

oh, my ass

no, we really are at texastock, hoser

no, I mean my ass - does it ever hurt

still? can't imagine why, hosehead - hehehe

the last thing I remember is going into that bait and beer store down the road and asking for some molson canadian

oh yeah, when that old guy heard you say "canadian", he knew you were ripe for the hosing, eh - turns out that he screwed some other canadian guy on a couple beat-up old Wurlies the other day - twice actually, so if he could screw a canadian that easily, and then you show strut in wearing that hot little toque...

I didn't strut - and you just took off pretty fast then, eh hoser

I'm still a virgin, mr macho macho man - and I wanna keep it that way

shut up eh - we weren't gonna talk about that anymore

okay eh

so this is 6709 sky road

yup, that's what that faded rusty old mailbox says

so where's the barn?

never mind that, where's the house?

you're right, there's nothing here

just an empty field

yup, just an empty field full of empty beer bottles and roaches and scorpions and fire ants and banjo center receipts...

shhh... listen

what

did you hear that?

hear what?

listen again

what?

that voice

what voice?

you didn't hear that? it said "they built it, and you came late, you hosers"

it's just like that movie "field of dreams"

yeah, except we got here late and got hosed, you hoser

you're the one that wanted to stop at "Harry's Hot Chaps Stick Inn"

shh... did you hear that

hear what?

listen

"TAKE OFF, YOU HOSERS"

whoa, that sounds serious eh

we better go eh

let's follow these tire tracks eh, looks like they're headed for new mexico

let's stay out of the bars though eh hoser

Careful fellas. It's easy to catch an ass full of rock salt down in them parts.

yeah, hosehead here knows how easy it is to catch an assfull

shut up eh - we're not gonna talk about that anymore, remember